This is another guest post by my (imaginary) friend The Very Honorable Ima Librul, Senator from the State of
Confusion Utopia. He was the first person of consequence to announce changes to the Bill of Rights enacted by President Obama and we are honored to have a post of this caliber by a quintessential Librul such as the Senator. He is a charter member of President Obama’s Go For It Team, a senior member of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee and Chairman of the Meretricious Relations Subcommittee. He is also justly proud of his expertise in the care and breeding of unicorns, for which his Save the Unicorns Foundation has received substantial Federal grants.
Today, Senator Librul has chosen to enlighten us on what President Obama needs to do to make his foreign and domestic policies work.
My dear friend President Obama seems, sadly, not to have been doing well lately. He may have been bested by Russian President Putin on Syria and some claim that He will also be bested on His Iranian nuclear weapons red line. According to an article from Israel titled The Lion that Squeaked,
In his speech to the nation on Tuesday, President Barack Obama was unable to bridge the gap between the public’s preferred course of action and his own over the situation in Syria. His speech was rife with contradictions and lacked any message of substance. On the one hand, his words expressed an uncompromising militancy and saber rattling over the war crimes committed by the regime in Damascus. However, by the time the speech was given it was even clearer to everyone that the chances of Obama following through with his threat of a military operation were slim to none.
Indeed, not only did the White House’s public relations barrage on the Congress do little to soften it or the public’s opposition to a military strike (essentially rendering it a mere pipe dream), with his speech he granted support — even if only partial and temporary — to the diplomatic guidelines set out by none other than Russian President Vladimir Putin to resolve the Syrian crisis.
With this in mind, Obama’s aggressive words rang especially hollow, and once again exposed America’s complete and utter foreign policy bankruptcy under his stewardship, because the option of a military strike has been shelved for now.
J. Leno not only attacked Him and His once highly respected administration, but members of the audience laughed!
So did Jon Leno, and the audience seemed to think that funny as well.
It is highly distressing to see our Dear Leader so grossly and unfairly disparaged. His glorious Affordable Care Act (sometimes known as “ObamaCare”) is less popular than it should be and it is possible that racist obstructionists — simply because they hate our President — may try to shut down the entire Federal Government soon. The Government is the only thing to which we all belong, so if they do so it will be disastrous for everyone.
In sad times like these, strong measures are needed. President Obama needs Smart Policies again. His Smart foreign and domestic policies earlier brought outstanding improvements to our nation after years of stupid Republican policies.
Our days of Smart Policies are sadly — but only temporarily if President Obama takes my advice — now in the past. Smart Policies need to be revived if One Nation Under Obama is again to be ours! Failure is not an option so we must Get Smart!
The following video shows our nation under chemical attack by Chaos, which had only begun to cause our citizens and even some of our leaders to become delusional. That is happening again. Fortunately, President Obama personally has been able to resist the thus far mild efforts of Chaos. Should those efforts become stronger, even He may be unable to resist them.
Through the non-conventional but courageous efforts of Mr. Smart and his lovely wife Chaos, along with its delusional thought machinations, appeared — as completely as President Obama defeated Al Qaeda — to have been defeated. Unexpectedly, Chaos has revived and, once again seems to be winning. Already, it is making many of our citizens and even some of our leaders mildly delusional. Is even our beloved First Lady Michelle delusional in encouraging us to drink more water?
“Since we started the Let’s Move! initiative, I’ve been looking for as many ways as possible to help families and kids lead healthier lives. I’ve come to realize that if we were going to take just one step to make ourselves and our families healthier, probably the single best thing we could do is to simply drink more water,” said Obama in a statement. “That’s it – it’s really that simple. Drink just one more glass of water a day and you can make a real difference for your health, your energy, and the way you feel. So Drink Up and see for yourself.”
Had many of us not already become delusional, President Obama would still be recognized, universally, as the very best President our
Republic Democracy has ever had. He would have unbounded support for every one of His fine initiatives and there would be overwhelming popular demands for an amendment to our aged Constitution to authorize additional terms in office, to which He would again be elected overwhelmingly. Instead, there has even been wild and delusional talk about impeaching President Obama — our nation’s greatest Bringer of Light and Truth ever! Only with Smart help can He do as He must and again defeat the forces of darkness.
Max Smart for President! He will be a tremendous improvement over The One For Whom We Had Been Waiting.
This is America the way I would like to be able to remember her.