EPA declares Islamists an endangered species

Following consultation with President Obama, the Epidemic Proliferation Agency (EPA) determined that Islamists promote a sustainable environment and, as friends of Mother Gaia, must be protected.
A parallel mandate is being written by the UN Human Rights Council.

Obama supporters in Cairo

Islamists rejoice upon hearing EPA announcement.

This giant step for Gaia follows a similar announcement by the other EPA, the Environmental Protection Agency. According to an article at a highly reliable Administration source — indeed more reliable than any other Administration source,

In a groundbreaking move today the Environmental Protection Agency declared that human beings are a contaminant on Earth.

“The science is settled. The evidence is overwhelming” declared EPA administrator Gina McCarthy.

Unless personkind is eliminated the world will be a unlivable polluted hellhole before long.  Time is running out.  We must take action.  Mother Earth cries out to us. The time of personkind is over.  The time of the apes has begun.  I mean, people do bad things to my mother Earth.

Accordingly the EPA has presented Executive Order 1376 to President Obama calling for the gradual elimination of mankind. Under the Executive Order effective immediately a “one-child’ policy will be implemented in the United States.  All women who are currently pregnant will be allowed to carry their pregnancy to term if, and only if, they have no other children.  Those who are pregnant but have other children will have abortions (covered under the Affordable Care Act.) Those who have yet to have children will be sterilized.

The next steps are also outlined in the linked article.

Stage two of the Executive Order will be implemented in 2020. Under Stage Two those deemed nonviable or redundant will be taken to Earth Wellness centers to be terminated.

. . . .

Stage Three, set to take effect in 2025, will begin after all the nonviables have been eliminated.

The determining factor in Stage Three will be a Federal lottery. Every American citizen will be assigned a random number. When a citizen’s number is up, so to speak, he will have one week to report to an Earth Wellness center.  We expect that most Americans will be more than happy to do their part to protect the environment. Naturally there may a remnant who wish to continue with their contaminant lifestyle. Those will be given a choice:  termination or life in Mexico.  We feel that that option provides the best chance of enforcement.

After the lottery elimination of Stage Three, Stage Four will begin: The building of spaceships that will orbit the Earth containing the best and brightest of America.  These elite will remain in orbit until it is determined that Mother Earth is once again a fit habitation for personkind.

Who will make it into this small group of elite survivors?

Those will high IQs.  Those who make over 250,000 a year and vote Democratic. Those who live on the East and West coast.  New York, Massachusetts, California and Oregon mostly.  Though we might throw in Vermont since they seem pretty progressive.

Here is a recent video of some of the prime candidates for the voyage.

The first move of the Epidemic Proliferation Agency following its own determination was to ban this video and all others like it.

Such videos disparage our Islamist brothers and even contend that they are sub-human. Some of them may, indeed, be sub-human. However, there is nothing wrong with that in our wholesome, diversity embracing society. It may also be true that Islamists sometimes kill Christians, Jews, others and each other. That’s good, not bad and besides, so what? Many other endangered species do the same thing; it’s just the way they are, so it’s fine. We cannot, and must not, be judgmental, a fatal and uniquely human flaw that defeats the entire purpose of our new, transformed and hence multicultural society.

Scorpion and frogThe Scorpion and the Frog

Some Democrats are foolishly concerned about minor problems associated with the rollout of ObamaCare and its companion website, Healthglitch.gov. They may even try to avoid campaigning on the joys of patriotic submission ObamaCare. They are encouraged to campaign instead on the herhistorically transformational plans of both EPAs. When doing so, they should highlight the similarities of those plans to each other as well as to the basic purpose of ObamaCare. That will be a surefire winning argument with Democrats, librul Republicans and left-leaning Independents.

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About danmillerinpanama

I was graduated from Yale University in 1963 with a B.A. in economics and from the University of Virginia School of law, where I was the notes editor of the Virginia Law Review in 1966. Following four years of active duty with the Army JAG Corps, with two tours in Korea, I entered private practice in Washington, D.C. specializing in communications law. I retired in 1996 to sail with my wife, Jeanie, on our sailboat Namaste to and in the Caribbean. In 2002, we settled in the Republic of Panama and live in a very rural area up in the mountains. I have contributed to Pajamas Media and Pajamas Tatler. In addition to my own blog, Dan Miller in Panama, I an an editor of Warsclerotic and contribute to China Daily Mail when I have something to write about North Korea.
This entry was posted in 2014, 2016, Abortion, Administrative Agencies, Andrew Klavan, Culture, Democrats, Elections, Executive Decree, Freedom, Global Warming, Health Control, Humor, Islamists, Libruls, Nanny state, Obama, Political Correctness, Politics, Satire, United States of Obama and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to EPA declares Islamists an endangered species

  1. Tom Carter says:

    Islamophobia = “the irrational fear of being decapitated.” I love it!

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