President Obama will issue an executive decree telling Iran what to do

The P5+1 deal with Iran, like ObamaCare and other laws of the land, means whatever He said (or may have meant to say) it means.

As noted here and elsewhere, the P5+1 deal with Iran may not appear facially to provide for the inspection of, and limitations on activities at, Iran’s military, missile and warhead development sites. Iran, due to her unsophisticated and therefore simplistic approach to matters far beyond her ken, relies on her fatally flawed facial approach to matters related to the deal to argue that the English language version is wrong and that she has given up nothing in exchange for relief from sanctions. However, President Obama has bravely drawn a red line and is firmly resolved that Iran shall not cross it. He has a pen and knows how to use it; He does not bluff. Hence, there is no problem with which He is unable to deal.

TOTUS Seal

According to my confidential White House informant, The Really Honorable I. M. Totus (the Teleprompter Of The United States), President Obama will soon issue a top secret Executive Decree requiring that Iran immediately acknowledge that the deal does, in fact, require inspections and limitations within reasonable limits.

Mr. Totus has graciously provided an advance copy of the Top Secret Executive Decree, which states:

Executive Decree, White House, February __, 2014

I, Barack Hussein Obama, President of the United States and universally acknowledged Guardian of the Universe, hereby decree:

1. The November 24, 2013 nuclear agreement between P5+1 negotiators and the Islamic Republic of Iran clearly states in its Governing Preface that Iran shall continue to seek only peaceful nuclear capabilities. It is necessary to verify that such continues to be the case.

2. Accordingly, Iran is hereby directed, immediately, to permit representatives of P5+1 to inspect all Iranian military sites, as well as all other places in Iran, as to which Iran advises that there is credible evidence that explosive nuclear devices, warheads in which they can be installed and missiles by which they can be delivered are present — unless Iran affirms that they are intended for solely peaceful purposes. The term “solely peaceful purposes” shall include, but not by way of limitation, preemptive strikes and other attacks against her enemies.

3. Consistently with my earlier directives, P5+1 representatives shall demand, and Iran shall  meet (in Iran’s sole discretion), a “very high threshold” for evidence that its nuclear efforts are limited to solely peaceful purposes as herein defined.

4. My Secretary of State, John Kerry, will confirm to me six weeks prior to the date of the 2014 U.S. congressional elections that Iran has acknowledged and is in full compliance with this Executive Decree.

5. Iranian officials are hereby granted Top Secret clearance for access to all U.S. documents so classified, including those labeled “NOFORN,” to permit them to read, understand and act upon this Executive Decree.

President Obama has made it perfectly clear that His remarkably forceful Executive Decree will accelerate the pace of P5+1 negotiations in the desired direction and that there will be no extraneous foreign policy issues to distract voters from legitimate issues in the November U.S. elections. Indeed, CNN and MSNBC were the first to acknowledge that the Executive Decree is President Obama’s most exciting and clear foreign policy statement thus far. Congressperson (and Chair of the Democrat National Committee) Debbie Wasserman-Schultz praised both media outlets for their profound understanding of President Obama’s foreign policy. She opined that Iran has no choice other than to comply with the Executive Decree, reluctantly.

Debbie Wasserman-Schultz He said what?

Speaker of the House Boehner, in a rare demonstration of bipartisanship, agreed with her and expressed total and absolute agreement with President Obama’s truly amazing Executive Decree.

 

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About danmillerinpanama

I was graduated from Yale University in 1963 with a B.A. in economics and from the University of Virginia School of law, where I was the notes editor of the Virginia Law Review in 1966. Following four years of active duty with the Army JAG Corps, with two tours in Korea, I entered private practice in Washington, D.C. specializing in communications law. I retired in 1996 to sail with my wife, Jeanie, on our sailboat Namaste to and in the Caribbean. In 2002, we settled in the Republic of Panama and live in a very rural area up in the mountains. I have contributed to Pajamas Media and Pajamas Tatler. In addition to my own blog, Dan Miller in Panama, I an an editor of Warsclerotic and contribute to China Daily Mail when I have something to write about North Korea.
This entry was posted in 2014, Atomic bomb, Boehner, CNN, Commander in Chief, Congress, Constitution, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, Democrats, Don't Ask Don't Tell, Elections, Executive Decree, Humor, Iran, Islamic rage, Israel, John Kerry, Libruls, Limitation on Authority, Middle East, Nuclear weapon test, Obama, Obama's America, Obama's America Now, P5+1, Peace, Peace in our time, Republicans, Sanctions, Satire, TOTUS, Unified State of Obama, United States and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to President Obama will issue an executive decree telling Iran what to do

  1. Pingback: Is the Nation of Rabid Rats advising Palestinians and Iranians on diplomacy? | danmillerinpanama

  2. The Obama administration remains committed to appeasement masquerading as diplomacy. If sanctions are effective, tighter sanctions would advance our aims — even more effectively. Our national policy should be nothing short of forcing Iran to give up their nuclear ambitions, not to elicit worthless promises from a relentless exporter of terrorism

  3. The MAD Jewess says:

    I dont ‘like’ Iran but why the heck are we involved in all 4 corners of the earth???

    • We probably should stop mucking around with some of the four corners; we tend to make matters worse, rather than better, for the U.S. and her allies.

      The Obama Administration has been pushing hard for the November 24th Iran “deal,” which is a farce and a scam. Iran is among the four corners ruled by clever but lunatic Islamists bent upon using nuclear weapons to eradicate the United States and others, including our apparently former (from the Obama perspective) close ally, Israel.

      Incidentally, the Israeli – Palestinian “peace process’ is one area where we should promptly sit down and shut up. Obama Administration demands that Israel yield to all Palestinian demands to move the “peace process” forward are not those of an “honest broker;” they are those of a pro-Palestinian jerk.

  4. Tom Carter says:

    Well done, and funny … but, one wonders whether Obama and his advisers would actually try to do something like this. At least it would be constitutional but stupid, as opposed to some of his recent unconstitutional but stupid actions.

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